THE MONTH BEFORE CHRISTMAS

THE MONTH BEFORE CHRISTMAS

 

'Twas the month before Christmas. The Senate and House,
Were both up for grabs, and each man and his spouse
Would vote foe a POTUS. But which should they choose?
No matter which won, the whole nation would lose!

However they voted, they knew they'd not fail,
To choose a new leader who should be in jail!
One failed to help diplomats in peril dire,
And the other, fit only contestants to fire.

One kept state secrets on a private mail server-
What evil thing had we all done to deserve her?
The other with ignorant comments was nimble,
But his knowledge of governing fit in a thimble.

A stern feminist and far Left was our Hill!
Her voice, how it cackled! Her words, oh, how shrill!
The Donald of riches had nary a lack,
'Cause he borrowed a lot, and did not pay it back!

He ripped off his workers and contractors, too,
And laughed at them saying, "There's nothing that you
Can do about this, 'cause you very well know
That to sue me would cost you far more than I owe!"

Old Hill promised free stuff and license to sin,
'Cause appeals to self-interest, well, surely would win.
But Donald, our filthy-rich scofflaw, and debtor,
Just knew that a con man like him could do better!

The way of the demagogue our Donald chose,
This working-class hero in Armani clothes.
While he drank champagne, and his followers, beers
He stirred up their anger and played on their fears.

Grotesque as he was, his supporters just smiled.
He was as mature as an eight-year-old child.
His mouth ran amok. With a confident grin,
The pundits said, "Hillary surely will win."

And then in a twinkling, I heard on that roof,
The stomping and stumbling of an orange-faced goof.
And amid all the clatter of hobnailed jackboots,
Came one with the Alt-Right and Vlad in cahoots.

His hat was of tinfoil, taped shut in the back,
His Russian elves my home computer could hack.
Of our Bill of Rights, he knew nothing at all,
And his profound delusions could only appall.

His eyes-oh, how crazy! His lips were in motion,
With ignorance vast as the Pacific Ocean.
His hair was all crazy, his face bright with hope,
That some passing woman he somehow could grope.

His every word with crazy thoughts was abuzz
Telling how all the ill-informed THOUGHT that it was.
For Muslims and Mexicans, his face bore a scowl,
His critics he threatened, and his language was foul.

He spoke and he spoke, but his mind didn't work;
He was incoherent, this crazy-haired jerk.
And placing his finger inside of his nose,
He pandered and pandered, and our anger arose.

Most who gave him their vote did so with a loud curse,
Thinking, "Bad as he is. that Hillary's worse!"
And .I heard him exclaim, as he played on our fears,
"Now my buddy Vlad can run wild for four years!"