At last! An Ode to Woad- on YouTube!

Ancient Celtic warriors used to go into battle naked, painted from head to foot with a blue herbal substance called woad. This, for my fellow ethnic Celts, as a whimsical look at our heritage:



The words (to the tune of Men of Harlech):

1. What's the use of wearing braces,
Spats and hats and boots with laces,
Vests and pants you buy in places
Down on Brompton Road?

What's the use of shirts of cotton,
Studs that always get forgotten?
These affairs are simply rotten;
Better far is woad.

Woad's the stuff to show men,
Woad to scare your foemen!
Boil it to a brilliant hue
And rub it on your back and your abdomen!

Ancient Briton ne'er did hit on
Anything as good as woad to fit on
Neck or knees or where you sit on.
Tailors, you be blowed!!

2. Romans came across the channel
All dressed up in tin and flannel
Half a pint of woad per man'll
Dress us more than these!

Saxons you can waste your stitches
Building beds for bugs in britches!
We have woad to clothe us, which is
Not a nest for fleas!

Romans, keep your armors,
Saxons, your pajamers!
Hairy coats were made for goats
Gorillas, yaks, retriever dogs and llamas!

March up Snowdon with your woad on,
Never mind if you get rained or blowed on!
Never want a button sewed on;
Go it, Ancient B's!!*

*Alternate final line: "W-O-A-D!"